Oil and Ole!

Ive been in Manali now for a couple of days, and though it is essentially just a smaller version of Dharamsala (Israelis smoking hash in small cafes that serve the same Israeli-Chinese-Indian dishes)I have adapted quite nicely-if I do say so myself. I came here with two girls - Shai and Suf - and a guy friend - Idan. They all knew eachother from back home but integrated themselves into the Dharamsala-group of Israeli friends I had made; so by the time of everyones departures, what once was one group had become three intertwined. Most all of us have since reunited here in Manali (a nice treat) and started new stories with one another. Again, its a lot of morning yoga and silent observation over lush scenary. But as of two days ago it became something different entirely. Before I would take rickshaws to the city, or go on hikes up to waterfalls, or even find myself and my friends at an impromptu carnaval riding yaks and charming snakes, shooting guns and riding coasters. And though none of that was bad, I began to feel a terrible feeling that my trip was coming to a close...nothing seemed new, everything seemed exhausted in a way. Then I got jealous of my three best guy friends (Yakir, Idan, Bentsi) and followed there lead and rented an 100cc Yamaha motorcycle for two days. Needless to say the last two days have been incredible. Touring the Himalaya mountain range here (even in this small space) in a group of four guys on big fat hogs has been incredible; and much needed to revitalize the feeling of my trip. Today I rented a 350cc Endfield and will take it tomorrow for more local touring. However, if tickets can be changed for relatively cheaply, then expect to find me in August going around Spitti and Paravati Valley for two/three weeks. IF. And if that can happen then Ill go back to Pune for my last week for more meditation, back to Bombay to catch my flight and then to New York...finally. I suppose well see how it all goes with STA, Amex and Citibank..and my mother! But the road lies ahead of me begging to be taken advantage of, and for her I lust. So, wish me luck! I let you all know how it goes as it goes but internet will be scarce where Im going (*thank god!)...With Love, A

Scorpions, Lamas, Spiders...Om My!

Today I leave for Manali - another faux-spiritual mountain paradise - on a ten hour bus ride with three israeli friends (Shai, Souf, and Idan). Im psyched to be moving on again; having gotten over the initial emotional strife that is leaving a place and heading towards another. As well, walking early this morning across the mountain plains to send off some packages, I came to realize I have little more than three weeks left (that is if I cant learn to ride a motorcycle in the next week and dont then decide to go on a bike tour of the himalayas with some other israeli friends). And with that time I also want to go back to Pune and do more Osho-meditation. But, all the same, its become clear to me that my time on this trip is winding down. Blessedly/Amazingly, I am ok with it; a feeling of perpetual closer that seems strangely mature when I think about from the perspective of my leaving-California-self, or leaving-Mamaroneck-self, or even my oh-shit-another-week-has-gone-by-self; the selves that used to fight change. So maybe thats a good thing. I suppose, more simply, Ive just been having too good a time to really think about the impermenance of travel, or relationships, or self, or time. These last few days are a testament to that. For while all my friends have begun to go their separate ways, as old relationships lose attention to new relationships, and as places Ive been lend experience to new places' inspiration, I have seen and done so much. Firstly, I have been taking yoga twice per day (two hours each) and gotten more involved in the specifics of it - both in its practice and its application. So, the other day while perfecting my head stand technique, the instructor helped me into scorpion pose: a head stand where the feet than rest on the top of the head, the head lifts from the floor, and the hands support the entire body. Amazing. The next day I did it completely on my own and couldnt shut up about it to whomever would listen. Then that same day (in the morning) I went to see the Dalai Lama. I sat for a while in his temple amongst throngs of tibetans, indians, foreigners...all really good energy. Then, as Im thinking my seats to be the worst in the house, he walked straight passed me with his famous smile. I was within touching distance but wasnt allowed to shake his hand or anything like that (bummer). Still, it was really nice just to be so close, to sit and meditate while he spoke...just to be there. Then that night, as a dear friend (Liran) packed up to leave for a trip to Thailand I chose not to go on, we friends all sat together - with the sun setting into the moon and the moon birthing the stars over the mountains - and watched as a gigantic spider hunted and devoured (mostly with no success) insect after insect. Trippy, it was...sure, but for some reason it was just really awesome to watch and quelled a lot of my feelings about moving on again. So, today, I am ready for the change...more so, I welcome it. Tomorrow, Manali. Then, as always, I dont know where to. I only know that time is inching ever closer to my planning. With love, A.

Its time to move on again; I know this is true because, like the last time and the time before that, certain elements of my journey in Dharamshalla have come full-circle: I have spent good time on my own exploring Self, good time with my self doing a lot of yoga (some good, some terrible), I have spent good time with others harvesting amazing relationships (some for a day, some for the whole of this), I have good time with others learning about others' lives (some Indian, most Israeli), I have spent good time with others learning about life (some gurus, some yogis, some peers, some dogs), I have spent great time learning new skills (Reiki) and great time bettering old skills (being social or being compassionate, or just walking in nature), and, especially, I have spent great time struggling with what next step I should make. I highlight this particular "great time" because it stands in the heart of journeying. Everyday I wake up and, evaluating my time in both my heart and mind, I meet the day with wonder as to where it will take me for the day and where it will take me in this whole trip. For a while it was mainly between continuing in India (going east to Manali, north to Leh, south to Rishikesh, back to Pune, and home) or taking a two week ($500 flight)to Thailand for two weeks and escaping the impending Monsoon; a weather system that has stalked me on this trip since day one, but that I have avoided with clever maneuvering. However the particular day went corresponding to how I saw my future: when I was having a bad day I dreamed of Thai beaches, but when I was having a wonderful day I saw the Himalayas ahead of me. Then I might meet a group going one place, or a friend going the other place and to such an extent did this all mess with my thinking (thinking too much) that I began just sort of waiting for a sign to guide me. All the while I was taking yoga everyday (morning and night) and in between downward-dogs I was learning the ancient meditative art of Reiki: using "universal life energy" to heal through hands. For three days I met with Shyam, my Reiki master, and grew in ways that I never thought I could, never thought was possible, or was just skeptical of the whole time; before I learned it and did it to others and healed them. Think what you will, but the shit is wayyyyyy powerful and has broadened my understanding of meditation and energy and compassion, etc. So that was amazing. Also, all the while, I was growing alongside others who, for fact of their having grown up in different parts of the world, were too growing with me. And in that parallel growth I made amazing friends, had amazing adventures, laughed deeply and smiled widely. A great time. But then they started off on their adventures, leaving me behind to meet others or do what I do...but all the same the reality of journeying set in again. And while that was going on I was getting so comfortable in this camp-like paradise that I became bored with little things, hungering for more but struggling to understand and put forth what it was that I was hungering for. Today I will continue with this struggle, suspecting that maybe Ill still save Thailand for another day: there is more to see in India. And maybe Ive got to still see about a girl...oy! Tomorrow Ill go to see the Dalai Lama, finally! And by that time I have to decide. But wherever I go, and whatever I see, the important thing is that Im doing it completely on my own. And that I wouldnt change for the world. So, when next I see you all and youre aching in any way ask me for Reiki...Ive got the power, power, power....With love, A.

Shalom from Dharamshalla!

This morning I awoke with no alarm clock for the first time in as long as I can remember. I have been sick for the last two days with a typical (I hope) head cold caused from the climatic change I experienced coming from Delhi to Amritsar (hot and hot) to Dharamshalla and Bhagsu (cold and wet), and have just kept to sleeping as much as I can. But this morning the sickness lost its stronghold over my sinuses and I met the sun with smiling salutation...literally: I climbed to the roof of my guesthouse and yoga-ed for an hour, then meditated for another halfhour. Before me was the Himachal Pradesh valley (amazingly lush greens bespeckled with cottages of pink and blue, and clouds rolling up like slugs) and behind me was the Himalayan mountain range (like nothing Ive ever seen in both majesty and beauty...and to think it goes farther, taller, and more beautiful as you travel more north!). I just sat there for a while smiling at where I had arrived to, from where I have been, and dreaming of where I will go to next. Like every other place Ive visited it takes a day or two to really "arrive" somewhere; when I first got here, with two israeli friends I made on the bus from Amritsar, life here was all about making friends, connections, finding things to do, etc. But after a day of that its just the same shit, only in hebrew: twenty-thirty something year olds sitting around smoking hash talking about the army and israel, asking me about America, and maybe watching a movie. Its like camp for them. For me, though, (and others who I have become especially close with)I have had to really dig in and either find more on my own or create more for myself. And its made all the difference here, as well it made all the difference at the Osho commune (where one must really weed through the bullshit to get to the essence), or at Varanassi (where one must really take the superreligious stuff with a grain of salt so as to appreciate the beauty of it), or at Delhi (where one must look past the extreme poverty to see a truly amazing city/way of life). So Ive found my way and am loving it. I take sitar lessons and yoga lessons and tomorrow I start Reiki lessons, and at night I hang out with israelis (good ones), because something like 99% of the people here are israeli. Tomorrow is also the Dalai Lamas birthday, so itll be a big party all over and then Saturday through next week I have tickets to sit and meditate with him (though from afar and with a big group)...which Im so psyched for. This place has amazing energy and Im learning so much just taking each day as it comes. Amritsar was cool too, but I was only there for two days, so it was a different experience. In a lot of ways it was like going to Agra to see the Taj Mahal: you go for the day, see beautiful monuments (the Taj is the most beautiful monument Ive ever seen), and then move on. In Amritsar I arrived in the morning, found a wonderful bicyclerickshaw driver to take me everywhere for two days (nice, honest, clean, friendly, informative...perfect in a sea of shitty bastard drivers)and so he did: first he took me around the bazaars (amazing: dirty and dark but with gorgeous colored clothes hanging everywhere)then he took me to the Golden Temple. Like the Taj, the Golden Temple just takes your breath away; everything is marble and ceremonial (you have to wash your feet and hands and where a headwrap)but when you enter the first thing you see is a grand pool and in the center is a truly golden temple. Millions of Sikhs are there praying and singing and washing and though at first it can all be tremendously jarring (on account of there not being much like it in America), eventually it is very peaceful and homey: people walk around with you and smile and take pictures with you and explain everything and are just sooooo friendly. I really loved Punjab for this reason. After the temple I went to the Pakistan border to watch the guard changing ceremony. It was almost equivalent to like a UCDavis/UCBerkeley football game...extreme rivalry, music, dancing, performance performance performance. Only in this case it was all in Hindi and hot as hell, but again I was quickly befriended by a sikh teenager who insisted he explain everything to me, and so it was really nice to see. The next morning my "driver" picked me up, took me to a crazy garden where the Indian "revolution" began: 2000 indians were massacred by British soldiers for no reason other than the fact that they were peaceful meeting to discuss change. I saw the well where many jumped into to escape the bullets; I saw the wall where many tried to climb in vain...and I saw the bullet holes in every brick and every tree. Fucked up. But not unfamiliar. I thought about it all on the 8 hour bus ride up to Dharamshalla: a beautiful journey through mountain terrains and winding roads with Himalayas in the distance, ever approaching. And then I met Raffi and Liran. I was happy to speak english with two guys my own age, and again excited about meeting more travelers on my own travels: its like Im alone, but never lonely. And since our meeting we have hung out together, met more friends together (and separately) and have had all kinds of amazing experiences. Or rather, I have hung out with great people, and I have made good friendships, and I have had all kinds of amazing experiences...and they have for them too...and we have done it, at times, together. And thats the best. Its raining a lot, which sucks, but the energy is too beautiful here to stop anyone from playing in it. While I have working internet I just wanted to put out to you all where I have been. As for where Im going, I dont know...there is only so much left available (because Monsoon has taken over most of India)...but wherever I go I know itll be great, because it has been so...what a feeling that gives me. I hope all is well with whomever is reading any of this, and please let me know just how well it is for you...I miss you all. Love, A